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financial aid appeal letter.. HELP! PLS!?

Ok, so i am needing help with this. I have to write this letter, the final day is tomorrow. any suggestions are MUCHLY appreciated

Dear Office of Financial Aid,
My name is Cassandra E. Webb; I am writing to appeal my suspension from financial aid. Unfortunately, this was my first college semester that I have taken, and I did very poorly. I have a few major issues that I believe took away my attention that should have been fully directed towards my classes. I believe that I took on too big of a load than I was ready for. I enrolled in 13 credit hours for this semester and was also working a part time job during this time frame. Towards the end of August, I totaled my car. It completely stressed me out because I knew I was going to have to find another car to buy and I was in no financial situation to do so, I also no longer had transportation to my classes and I live about 45 minutes from Johnson County Community College. On top of just the stress, I was missing classes due to lack of transportation and also losing money because I was forced to miss a few days due to injury and again, lack of transportation. I started to get back on track after finding a car to replace the totaled one. In mid September, I had another issue that completely spun my world around. I found out that I was going to be a mother, and that completely freaked me out and I lost all sort of grip that I had on my life’s plan. I was able to pull myself together and attend some of my classes, but due to extreme fatigue, I found myself in bed sleeping more than ever before. This pregnancy drained me mentally and physically, which showed as my grades started dropping. As we all know, this fall/winter is flu season, and I, of course, kept catching them. Right after I would finally overcome one sickness, just a few days later I would catch another. Since I was pregnant, I was not able to overcome my illnesses for a few weeks. After I caught the 3rd illness, and it seemed to be going nowhere, I was forced to go to the emergency room. They believe I had a either a bad flu or a slight pneumonia. These illnesses caused me to be bed-redden for days. After overcoming all these obstacles, I found myself too far behind in a few of my classes causing me to drop one. I do take full responsibility for not completely these classes; I believe I was not prepared for what I was getting myself into; I didn’t know how hard it was really going to be. This spring semester I am going to be taking 6 credit hours online so I will be sure to not be overwhelmed. I am ready to commit myself to these classes that I will be enrolled in the spring. My parents are unable to help me with any financial issues and without help from financial aid I will not be able to attend this spring semester. I am providing a proof of pregnancy and a copy of part of the police report, from the wreck, for documentation. Unfortunately, when I went to the emergency for my illness, they only gave me paperwork on the medication they were giving me, which I threw away after completing the prescription. I have always dreamed of going to college and getting my degree, without this I will feel as if I have failed. If I do not attend classes this semester, I will be forced to start paying off my loan, which seems impossible to do so at this time. I cannot emphasize how important this is to me. I appreciate your time and consideration towards reading my appeal.
Sincerely,
Cassandra E. Webb

Public Comments

1. It looks like you are on the right track! Along with what you have already stated, please consider this:

More important than proving that you had a problem, will be proving that you no longer have one!

So offer all the proof you can that you are now seriously committed to your college career.
Talk with anyone and everyone you can, (peer counselors, student advisers, instructors, financial aid advisers, even student services receptionists) who might give you insight into this appeal process and what is expected at your school. Along with the info you gain, many people will be aware of your dedication to this issue.
Depending on what you learn about requirements where you are, you may be wise to present evidence such as: that you have a stable living arrangement now, are in good health (congrats on your baby!!!) and that you have reliable transportation (with back up plans!). Since you plan to take online courses for the time being, it might be a good idea to emphasize that you have reliable access to the internet, also.
In my case I had not been aware of all the resources available at my college, so for my appeal I used references from the various agencies and departments that are helping me now.
Even after the appeal process, you may be faced with a probationary period. It may be rough, but will not last forever! Let's face it, in this economic climate, a college education is worth the effort!
So go on the offensive here, and I believe it will pay off!

2. colleges.mywebcommunity.org - it has detailed info how to apply for financial aid and scholarships to get more cash.